Out of Hiding

Adam Lambert and Kris Allen. Holy crap, you guys.

I've been saying for awhile now that this is the greatest season of Idol ever, and now we're about to embark on a finale so magical that I couldn't not write about it. Here's how I've felt every other season at this point.

Season 1: Kelly Clarkson and Justin Guarini
Had Justin Guarini won, I never would have watched the show again. I loved Kelly Clarkson intensely, and hated Justin Guarini with the fire of a thousand suns.

Season 2: Ruben Studdard and Clay Aiken
I thought Ruben was all right, but found Clay Aiken creepy and loathsome. He's grown on me a bit since, mostly because of his guest run on Scrubs, but at the time I was just like, "Um, I'll root for Ruben? I guess?"

Season 3: Fantasia Barrino and Diana DeGarmo
Didn't really care.

Season 4: Carrie Underwood and Bo Bice
Felt almost as intensely as in season 1 that Carrie should win over Bo, but my love for Carrie was not as strong as my love for Kelly.

Season 5: Taylor Hicks and Katharine McPhee
I thought McPhee kind of sucked by the time we got to the finale, in that she was really inconsistent, but was rooting for her over Taylor Hicks. Honestly, if I hadn't had the blog, I probably would have stopped watching when Taylor won, such was my anger and disappointment.

Season 6: Jordin Sparks and Blake Lewis
Was only rooting for Jordin because I didn't want smarmy, lame Blake Lewis to win.

Season 7: David Cook and David Archuleta
Hated David Cook. Found David Archuleta creepy and sad. Didn't really want either one of them to win.

Which brings us to now. No matter who wins, I will be completely, 100 percent delighted. I think they're both smart and talented and adorable, albeit it in completely different ways -- Chris is subtle, Adam's in your face. No matter who wins, I think they're both going to have long, successful careers.

You guys, this season might have gotten me invested enough in the show again to want to blog about it next year. Can you believe it? Oh, and Gokey? Suck it.

Top 12: The Recap

The Top 12 mangled, er, I mean sang the songs of one Ms. Diana Ross. Here's a rundown of tonight's mixed bag of crap and cool:

Brandon Rogers
Performed: "Can't Hurry Love"
Um, did Brandon even sing tonight? 'Cause I don't remember it. Let's just go ahead and put Brandon in the Bottom Three, shall we?

Melinda Doolittle
Performed: "Home"
Yet another masterful performance by the lovely Melinda. I love love LOVE the fact that she welled up when she heard the applause in the bigger auditorium. It genuinely and sincerely blew her away. What a moment for her! I'm glad she was given a little time to bask in it.

But do you know what I love even more? Paula had her first crying fit! This means some much-needed activity in The Scattergram.

Chris Sligh
Performed: "Endless Love"
I didn't think it possible to make this song suck, but suck it did. I sort of understand why Chris tried to change it up since the judges have criticized contestants for not adding anything new and interesting when they dared tackle divas like Whitney, Mariah and Celine in the past. But dude, this was bad.

However, I don't know if I agree with blaming the contestants for the sorry arrangements, as was the recurring theme tonight. It seems Chris and the others had significant input but methinks Rickey Minor could have exerted some of his own influence a bit more to make the songs not, you know, suck balls.

Gina Glocksen
Performed: "Love Child"
I just knew she'd sing this song. I smelled it from a mile away. This is not a song just anyone should attempt. It demands passion, experience, depth and mileage that Gina just does not have. Barring that, it requires a set of brass ones and well, Gina does seem to be equipped in this regard.

Sanjaya Malakar
Performed: "Ain't No Mountain High Enough"
Can we all please agree to stop voting for this kid? If not, we're going to have keep looking at gruesome images like this:

Stop the torture. Please. Seriously, stop.

Haley Scarnato
Performed: "Missing You"
Believe it or not, I'm going to side with Simon on this one... I don't think Haley screwed it up that bad tonight. Yeah, she forgot the words and got flustered but, for the first time, I detected a nice tone in her voice and she actually showed some personality after Simon complimented her. Personally, I think he overpraised her a little bit as a make-good for last week's "I don't remember your name" insult but still, she definitely improved over her previous performances. Even so, I think she's in the Bottom Three.

Phil Stacey
Performed: "I'm Gonna Make You Love Me"
Recapping Phil's performance would require me to think about him and when I do that, I have to go to a dark, scary place. And I don't wanna. Don't make me.

LaKisha Jones
Performed: "God Bless the Child"
I liked this. I did not, however, like the dress. The vocal was really good but I couldn't really dig in and enjoy it fully because of that white mass on my TV screen. That dress was downright menacing.

Like, it was cool that Diana Ross offered LaKisha some wardrobe suggestions but I just wish she stressed one very important point in particular: White is not at all slimming, Kiki. Not.at.all.

Blake Lewis
Performed: "You Keep Me Hangin' On"
Uh, was I supposed to be all blown away by that? I know that's what Blake was going for and totally expecting. In fact, it looked like he was getting ready for a shower of effusive praise and flowing Paula tears but what he got instead was a rather tepid response.

No doubt he and Gina are moisturizing their chapped asses with lots of Vaseline tonight. Ew, that was a gross visual. Sorry.

Stephanie Edwards
Performed: "Love Hangover"
Stephanie's voice showed a smooth yet textured quality to it tonight that I hadn't detected before. I was waiting patiently for the tempo shift where she could really let rip but it never happened. Bummer because I think she could have finally established herself. Instead, I fear she's earned a spot in the Bottom Three.

Chris Richardson
Performed: "The Boss"
Okay, so his voice was all over the place and it kind of sucked. I don't care. He's still cute and I love him.

Jordin Sparks
Performed: "If We Hold On Together"
Again, I'm with Simon. It was a "gooey" song but she made it work. And did I mention she's beautiful? And stunning? And lovely? It's official: I'm smitten. If you'll excuse me, I'm off to buy her flowers.

Predictions
Bottom Three: Brandon, Haley and Stephanie
Going Home: Brandon