Two for Two!

At the risk of seeming boastful, can I predict the soon-to-be booted or can I predict the soon-to-be booted?! Admittedly, I've sucked with my bottom three predictions but I have been on the money with my Top 12 cast-off soothsaying. Brandon Rogers? Check! Stephanie Edwards? Affirmative! However, do not mistake my bragging for actual glee because while neither Brandon nor Stephanie would have won the whole damn thing, both of them are more deserving of a spot in the Top 10 than Sanjaya or Haley. Bogus.

Other than that, I really only have one note from tonight's results show:

Peter Noone should never clap his hands or attempt "dancing" in public ever again. Actually, I'm going to extend this ban to private clapping and dancing as well.

What the hell was he doing up there? Like, he kept awkwardly jabbing at the air while bending at the knee to bounce in place. White stereotypes aside, can this really be considered dancing?

And then! Then! Peter Noone executed an unexpected -- and very alarming -- pelvic thrust in the direction of the Idol hopefuls. In one moment, he was giving them an innocuous thumbs up and in the next, he was treating them to an eyeful of his decrepit old man junk. If you ask me, Peter Noone has all the makings of a flasher. How many easy-open rain coats does he have in his closet, I wonder?!

Here's the Top 10 (aka People I'll Violently Boo During the Idols Live! Tour with the Exception of Melinda Doolittle Unless She Does Something between Now and Then to Piss Me Off, Which I Highly Doubt):

1. Melinda Doolittle
2. Gina Glocksen
3. Lakisha Jones
4. Blake Lewis
5. Sanjaya Malakar
6. Chris Richardson
7. Haley Scarnato
8. Chris Sligh
9. Jordin Sparks
10. Phil Stacey