The Official Paula Abdul Scattergram: Week 4

This week American Midol has determined that Paula's level o' crazy is 2 (out of a possible 10). For closer inspection and to preserve your eyesight, please click on the graph to enlarge:

Click to enlarge

Analysis: I am chagrined to report that Paula scored really low on the crazy scale this week. The bitch was downright subdued in San Antonio. The hell?

This week's result does come with a footnote though. Last night's episode was an aggregate of all auditions thus far so it was hard to apply a singular, accurate number. Besides, the editors left out of most of Paula's batshittery (yeah, I made up that word. What of it?) in favor of wall-to-wall screeching "singers" and their suspect dance moves.

So take this week's reading with a grain of salt, fellow wack-job watchers, since it wasn't based on two full episodes. Hope is on the horizon because next week is Hollywood Week! I predict the monotony will spur at least one Paula meltdown and/or crying jag. Other predictions? Lay 'em on me.