On Being Babs' Blow

Oh, how Jess and I love to discuss the 'American Idol.' We chat about it frequently and fervently. We opt for mixed media -- face-to-face conversations, phone calls, IMs, email and text messages -- to paint our impressions of the program. For example, today's IM:

Jess: Katie McPhee totally oversang that song.

Yours Truly: That's 'cause it was a Barbra song. I think there's like a law or something. Like, if you don't oversing and schmact your way through one of her numbers, it makes Barbra angry. She'll inhale you through that enormous snout of hers.

Jess: I did not know that.

Yours Truly: Oh yeah. She'll totally snort you like a line of coke off James Brolin's ass.

And scene!